‘Oh, I know. This is still the first glass I poured myself. I thought about getting drunk, really drunk, but I decided that would lessen the guilt I feel and I don’t want that.’ ‘What guilt?’ Robert looked at me with an expression that combined sympathy and exasperation. ‘Robert, I KILLED him. Deliberately. I was so filled with rage that all I wanted to do was rip his throat out. I can’t even hide behind the fact that I was hungry. I just wanted him dead. Feeding was an unconscious. And the new permissiveness of the 1970's had not made my life any easier.I would watch these talk shows. You know, the ones with Masters & Johnson and Xaviera Hollander on them, and think. Is this all there is? There's something missing in my life.For all our prosperity, my life was devoid of excitement. When all was said and done, I was just a glorified maid. The sum-total of my existence was wrapped up in cleaning and cooking and meeting the demands of other people.What about me? What about. "I started to Harry, but your bodyguards stopped me before I had gone ten feet up the drive. They said they were under orders you weren't to be bothered by anyone."I got out my cell and called Preacher. I went off on him, saying if any law enforcement wanted to come up to my place his men were to call it in and let them by. I also told him that if it happened again, I would personally come down there and kick his ass up between his shoulder blades. He apologized but I didn't hear the end of it. An agency over there wants a fresh face. A British look. They love the portfolio I sent over to them. Now all that remains is for them to test you. In Vegas. All expenses paid. You can’t lose, beautiful Lauren.’ She laughed nervously, shifting her bottom uneasily on the seat. Was he actually serious? Vegas? So soon after joining the Agency? Was this a wind up? ‘Yeah, right,’ her dry voice eventually said. His eyebrows went up in that theatrical way of his. ‘Didn’t I tell you I’d look after.
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